" Praise the Lord and Curse that Devil! "

Psalms 107:1"Give thanks to the Lord, for he is good. His love endures forever"

FINALLY! A peaceful, pleasant, wonderful, and even FUN evening at the Lowe house last night! Talk about the perfect evening! Here is how the evening went......
Got the girls home-- Jaylee wanted to play outside, and Jentri was sleeping. So, I got to spend some one on one time with her. I then went inside to start supper, while I had the chance because at this stage of life, you take advantage of every single minute! Jentri kept napping, I got supper 75 % complete, and she woke up. I stopped cooking, and went outside to nurse her while Jaylee continued to play. After nursing, Jentri stayed in her bouncer and was content! I went in and made a new colic remedy of "cucumber juice" and also finished supper. Jentri continued to be happy and supper was ready! I actually got to sit down, AT MY TABLE, with Jaylee and eat our dinner. We even got to say our dinner prayer before eating! (This is my next goal with her is learning to pray before meals!) I sat right there and silently said "TYJ!" Jaylee and I had a yummy spaghetti supper and then back outside she went while I did the dishes. I also got both of our lunches prepared for today, because Jentri was still happy! I then went back outside and played some more with Jaylee while Jentri just looked around, happy as could be in her bouncer! It was then coming upon 7 o'clock and that's bath time right now at our house. Bathtime seems to be the WORST part of the evening. I don't know if it's because we have all 3 hit the lowest part of our day, but bath time has never gone off without one or the other, and most of the time, BOTH girls screaming and crying at some point! I got Jaylee bathed, then Jentri.... and Jentri ended up being the one to cry. However- it was time to eat so this was probably the reason because it wasn't her screaming cry. Got both girls in their pj's and then gave Jentri her round of medicine, this time a dose of the cucumber juice. WOW! We never screamed- she nursed and went right to sleep! Jaylee was asleep by 8, Jentri was down by 9 and I got to have an HOUR of ME time! I actually got to upload photos to facebook (hasn't been done in a month)! I even got to take a bath and shave my legs (hasn't been done in 2 weeks!). I even got to catch up on the news feeds in facebook (haven't been on there in a week!) Then, talked to my husband for a good while, then I was off to bed and tucked in by 10! We all three got a good night's sleep, and Miss Jentri didn't wake up until 5 to eat!

OK- so enough of the play by play-- overall-- TYJ for a WONDERFUL evening!! It continued onto this morning and both girls were happy, pleasant and ready to go to Miss Robins! I am not sure if it was the cucumber juice, or my change of attitude, or trying to have more patience.....but whatever it was.....I'm praying for a repeat of this EVERY night!!!!!

Dear God.....will things ever get back to normal?

So, I've been doing alot of wondering, praying, and begging lately for God to just return my life back to normal. I've spent lots of evenings in tears, just upset because life just feels like a roller coaster right now. But then I stop and think....normal? What the heck is normal? Was "normal" back last year when Jeremy was on harvest, and we didn't see him for a whole 2 1/2 months? Or was "normal" this past winter when Jeremy left for his job in Canadian, and it was just Jaylee and I? Normal isn't us, and I don't know when it ever will be. I've heard many people say lately "I just wish Jeremy could get a job closer to home..." Well, it's like I was telling a close friend recently... let's play out the scenario of him getting a job closer to home.............
A. He goes back to work for the family farm.... which means.....still on harvest....not getting to see at all until November.....which then goes back to struggling financially...which then turns into more stress on our life....
B. He gets a job closer to home, and he will not work an 8-5 job indoors..... Ok--- so I'm still the one getting the girls ready, dropping them off every morning, and he will be home, hopefully by supper time, if not later, so which still means, I'm to deal part of the evening with the girls. So, what's a few more hours? And the job probably won't pay near what he get's paid now- so we are back to letter A of financial stress as well.
C. He's a man, and a "typical" man, who probably will help here and there, but let's face it ladies- does any man ever do everything exactly the way we need/want it to be done?
D. He comes back home, so not only am I having to handle two children in the evenings, but I'm also back to balancing marriage and family and basically, let's face it, a 3rd child!

So- of course, I'd love the "white picket fence marriage" that all the movies play out and my sisters get to live of hubby leaving in the morning and home by supper, but that wasn't my husband before I married him and that's not him today. There are days when the job is over at 5, and there are days when the job is over at 9, and then there are days where he can work all night, but finally throws his hands in. So, instead of little girls standing at the door, daily, asking "when is daddy coming home?" and me never knowing hour to hour; we do know, regularly, and routinely, that in just 5 more days/ fingers, daddy IS coming home and he WILL be home, for certain 3 nights.

My thoughts vs. God's Word

Do you ever question if you're ever good enough? Life has been so crazy and so busy here lately, I have seemed to put God "on hold ." or even yet, on the back burner. I'm so ashamed! No wonder my days have seemed like the "days from hell" recently. I have often found myself, asking myself "what the hell did I get myself into? I knew 2 kids would be a little bit more work, but I sure didn't expect this!" I keep on telling myself, things have got to get better, things won't always be this tough, etc! BUT THEY AREN'T GETTING BETTER! While Jeremy is away, I've always felt Gods comfort, protecting us all while we are apart. But here lately- I couldn't feel more distant from HIM and I know now why that is. I moved. How stupid could I be? To think that I could possibly live this life and do it without talking to HIM on a daily basis?! As I was reading my daily devo for the day, I stumbled across these thoughts, and found some scriptures to help rid of the negativity.

I'll share a few:

My thought: I want to give up!
God's Word: Be committed. (Matthew 5: 33-37)

My thoughts: I feel lost!
God's Word: He watches my path and establishes my ways (Proverbs 5:21, 4:26)

My thoughts: I'm all alone and NO ONE understands me! (and my lifestyle!)
He will never leave me. He has plans for my life. (Deuteronomy 31:6, Jeremiah 29:11)


Hopefully and prayerfully, things will start to get back on track!!!!!