In a funk!

Have you ever been in a funk? You know what I'm talking about.... just that mood where you just "don't care?". Yup, I'm there, and have been for about a week now. Why you might ask, or what the cause is. That, I can't answer. I've pondered, recently, asking myself "why do I feel this way?" Even had a coworker stop and ask if I was ok this week. I then asked myself "Am I ok?"
I don't know.
First of all, one trigger would be my mother getting a new job. She has spent the past 3 years working away from home, in prayerful hopes of one day returning home. Recently, God fulfilled his plan for her and she now gets to return home and be back in her home, out of the trailerhood, and with her husband.  Let me just get it out that I couldn't be happier for her and my stepdad. However, this is my funkiness- I may be just a tad bit jealous that I'm not home anymore. Now with her being there she is able to attend and go to things of my nieces and nephews, yet still be 3 1/2 hours away from my kids. Some may call it selfish, yet some have told me that my feelings are normal. What gets me to feeling this way the most is looking back at my Grandmother and her 4 girls (my aunts). My mom was the one who lived 6 miles from my Grandmother- so my Grandmother was able to attend, do, and give to us (grandchildren) at anytime! Yet, it always had to be a planned trip to go see her other 3 children and their families. She wasn't at their day to day functions. Nor was she at their Sunday lunch table every Sunday. And that's the part that's hurting the worst- Sunday lunch. Everyone sitting around my mom's table, everyone visiting, cousins playing, and yet, we won't be there.
Don't get me wrong- I'm happy where I am in life. I love Canadian, I wish there was an even bigger word for LOVE when it came to my job. I can't wait for Jaylee to start school here next year. I feel like Educationally, we have and are giving our girls the absolute best compared to where we came from. Yet, it's the little things that get me. I know my Mom will make the effort to attend big things like Dance Recitals and such, however, when time goes on and we are playing basketball games every Thursday evening, I know that won't be the case. Yet, if I was home, she would probably be at every one of them.
So, pardon my funky self. I'm just working through some things currently!